The Real Plague Carriers

I'm sick. ...Again.
I went for several years without even a yearly physical, and yet this year, since starting my new job at an elementary school, I've been about four times... in about three months. And I'm sick again.
I went 23 years without any allergies, and in the past two months I've had two added to my medical record.
I'm now convinced that it wasn't rats who carried the plague, it was children.
I feel like I have Typhoid Mary in my class.

Solo camping

So it turns out I do have something interesting to write about.
Last weekend was my first adventure in solo camping. So as anyone who has ever met me knows, I get cold very easily. As in, I'm a total wuss, and when the temperature drops below about 70F, I start shivering. For a girl born and raised in NH, that is just unacceptable. ... And pathetic.
Anyways, When I had a three-day weekend and was in desperate need of a break from reality, I decided to test out my new sleeping bag-- I've had the same sleeping bag since I was about 10, and while it is still fully functional, it is not a cold-weather bag. Since winter lasts like 3/4 of the year where I am, it made sense (after more than a decade) to finally upgrade to something a little less summery. This might also have been prompted by the overnight trip we took the middleschoolers on this summer at the camp I worked at-- one of the younger girls had the same sleeping bag. Don't judge me; I needed a new one.
So I decided to test out my cold-weather gear. My dad has some property out in the middle of nowhere. For those of you who have ever been to NH, you may scoff at the phrase, thinking that it encompasses the whole state, but no, this is in the middle of nowhere by NH standards; as in complete with bobcat, bear, and roads that don't even exist, according to my GPS.
I tried to convince my dad to go with me, but he was off on another hunting trip, so I had the choice of going alone, or bailing. I went.
The few people I told thought I was kidding. Like I said, I get cold easily. I wore sweatshirts in the Kalahari desert. No kidding. And this is November in NE.
I got there after dark, set up camp (in the dark, in the woods, by myself. Shut up, I'm proud of myself) and built myself a little fire. I tucked myself as far down in my new sleeping bag as I could go, and thus passed the first night.
I got woken up by mergansers splashing in the lake, making a total racket. Day one spent reading, watching the critters, hiking, cooking over another fire... it was lovely.
Another night, another day like the first. I not only survived the chilly nights, but it was such a beautiful way to spend the weekend after the stress of the week. Plus when you're so far out that you can't see a single light from civilization, the stars are unimaginably beautiful.
...And I just really like building campfires.

Shameless Plug

So I haven't posted in months, it's true. This was started (and intended) as a public travel journal, and ended up being a "this is my life" sort of thing. Lately, my life hasn't been interesting enough to write about. It happens. So what does one write about when daily life is too boring?

Well, you can now follow my socio-political ideas over at "What's Wrong With This Picture" (subversiverants.blogspot.com) or for something less weighty, you can read up on ideas for fun, food and fix-ups at "Try This At Home" (fixthis.blogspot.com).

Unless I start traveling again, or at least start leading a more interesting life, odds are this one won't have much to say, but I'll do what I can. Until then, enjoy some of the other brain-leakage! Who knows, there might even be a good idea or two in there somewhere.

Afterprom

At 23, I feel a bit old for Prom. Apparently, though, I don't look it.
Since Merry's boyfriend Ben is a teacher, and his friend Nick is a substitute teacher, to keep them company while they chaperoned the After-Prom Party, Merry and I crashed the affair for some awesome bowling, which I totally rocked. Plus we got free cotton candy, which is always a good thing.
Then we tried to leave. They wanted me to "sign-out," believing me to be a highschool student. I nearly had to pull out my drivers license, and Nick had to vouch for me. I didn't realize I looked that young.

As my moving date approached, Kyle (yes, from the Gettysburg trip) made a repeat appearance, wandering around the harbor with me, scandalized that in the months I'd lived in the area, I'd spent so little time in Baltimore itself. We also hit up the Baltimore Zoo. Very depressing. Don't go to the Baltimore Zoo.

For my last day, Nick took me to the Baltimore Aquarium, where I tried to push him into the Shark Tank. Someone else must have already had that idea though, because they'd taken precautions against such things. Major bummer. The Cheesecake Factory afterwards more than made up for the lack of shark-week inspired drama.

The drive back to NH was thankfully uneventful, although painfully long. Bailey has been tormenting my little sister's dog since we got here, but the wanton destruction of cardboard boxes and toilet paper has apparently stopped, so I have no qualms about letting my cat chase the dog if that's what it takes to keep her occupied and entertained.

Mom's Day

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Gettysburg

I went to Gettysburg once as a little girl, with my mom and my sisters. I loved reading about the Civil War, and was ecstatic to get to SEE where things happened.
It rained. The whole time. And every electronic tour-guide thingy pronounced it "get-iss-berg" which annoyed the crap out of me.
But hey, it was still cool. Place names I'd read about a thousand times, like Devil's Den and Little Round Top were actually real, and I could climb all over them. I could actually SEE where Pickett's charge was.
Fast forward about a decade or so:
A college friend from freshman year (for those of you who don't remember, that was in New Jersey) called me up. Apparently both of us were about an hour away from Gettysburg. Daytrip!
Kyle, who had been to Gettysburg a lot more frequently than I had, suggested meeting up at this quaint little restaurant for lunch, then making a day of it. When he was telling me about it, I'd thought he was exaggerating, but no: the Dobbin House actually DOES have THE BEST french onion soup ever made. It's ruined me forever. Now I'm going to have to drive all the way back to Virginia anytime I want french onion soup.
We also had rum drinks and actual food, but who cares about that.
Then we wandered into the Guest Center in search of a map, or really any sort of guidance. They suggested an Auto Tour, but who wants to see everything from a car? We were told we wouldn't be able to walk everywhere. We rolled our eyes; we're twenty-something. Clearly we know better.
So on foot, we set off. We wandered around, probably in circles and zigzags, for HOURS. After a brief stop at Friendly's for sundaes, we were off again. We ended the day watching the sunset from the top of Devil's Den. 11:30 a.m. lunch, wandered all day, half an hour for ice cream, wander somemore, and left at 8:30 or 9ish at night. Looking at the map, we HAD covered just about everything.
Yep, we showed that Info Center Lady: You CAN walk it... as long as you're willing to not be able to walk the next day (my feet were KILLING me).

Stuff

I gave my notice at work. I don't have anything lined up, or a solid idea of where I'm going, but I will NOT be here after the end of May, so in my mind, that's a start.
Now normally, I'd be panicked without some sort of plan, even if it was just a back-up plan, but for some reason, I'm not. I'll be okay.
So I've been half-packed to move for over a month. That might have something to do with why I don't feel nervous about leaving-- I can't WAIT, so it's hard to think past move-out day.
As I've been sorting all my things and packing, I've discovered everything I own can be placed into one of four categories:
1) Necessities/Practicalities: Things like a toothbrush, food, pillow, towels, bike, REAL maple syrup, pocketknife, knee brace and the bare essentials of clothing.
2) Fluff: Things I WANT, that may make my life more interesting or fun, but I don't actually NEED to survive from day to day, like computer, dvds, pens, and most people would say books, but I list them in that first category.
3) Memorials: Pictures, trinkets I picked up in foreign locales, presents people have given me...
4) Everything else. I don't know why I have this stuff, I rarely use it, don't really want it, but can never seem to find it when I'm throwing stuff out or using things up.
My mission in life, for the end of this month, is to completely eradicate that fourth category, and severely weed out the second. Bailey's been helping by eating or otherwise destroying everything she doesn't think I really need (clothes, computer cords, headphones, cardboard boxes for packing things, my bike...)

Does Anyone Still Read This?

It'd be nice to know if I'm wasting my time.

The Life of a Hermit

So some of you know that what I miss most about not living in MD is having space. I need breathing room. I need trees. I need to not have neighbors constantly buzzing around my house. It makes for very claustrophobic living. Plus I keep thinking I'm going to end up running over one of the millions of little neighbor kids who keep riding their bikes in the parking lot and darting out into the street.
Dad has been building a little bunker of sorts on Jackson Pond. For those of you who've been there, it's literally in the middle of freaking nowhere. His creation (which isn't done yet) will be basically one tiny square room with a dirt floor. Four walls, a ceiling, a door and a woodstove. No electricity, no running water, no conveniences. Well, there is a spring a couple yards away. That's kind of convenient.
Anyways, Dad offered me this little haven for awhile, and I've been more than seriously considering it. He says it probably won't be finished till late summer, but I'm hoping it gets done much sooner. What does it say about me and my current situation that I'm like "electricity? I don't REALLY need it..."
I've used a few people as sounding boards so far. No one seems to think I can hack it. Dad says it'd be a good experience for me, but I'm not sure he has any faith in my endurance either. He also says it'd be easier to live there late fall through the winter than it would during the summer, mainly because of the bugs. I don't disagree that the bugs are going to be awful, but I know my abilities well enough to know that I can be moderately self-sufficient in warm weather, and probably even live there through a Maryland or New Jersey winter, but I am not tough enough to survive a NH winter there by myself. I hate the cold on a normal basis, and don't think I'm strong enough to shovel my way out of the hut all the way back up to the road, I doubt that road gets plowed well, and I'm even less sure that my little Toyota Echo could handle it even if it WERE plowed. I'd have to either hibernate or starve, because I think I'd be stuck.
But anyway, here's what I've come up with so far; tell me what you think:

*No running water.
Inconvenient, but there is a nearby spring. As long as I'm willing to haul my own water, I can manage. I have a solar shower for when it's bright and sunny out, and I'll have a woodstove for when it's not. All I need is a flat non-dirty platform (or rock!) to stand on, and voila, insta-shower (just add water!). For laundry, I remember Dad had a little hand-crank one. It took forever, but it works. I'm not sure if he has his anymore, but I found where I can get one anyways. All else fails, I'll go visit the 'rents and borrow their washer. Clothes lines-- wonderful inventions. No electricity needed!
*Heat.
Okay, so this is kind of a problem. I'll have the woodstove and I'm great at setting fires, but it's the wood that's the problem. Scavenging sticks is all well and good, and I'll definitely spend a lot of time doing that, but I've never had to chop wood before. I asked Dad to show me how, and he said he'd do it for me as long as I carried it and stacked it. I think he's worried I'll chop off a limb by accident. Since that's sort of my fear too, I'm willing to go with him on this one.
*Cooking.
A bit time consuming, but I've cooked over woodstoves and fires before. Plus not all food needs to be cooked! I won't starve.
*Refrigeration.
Watertight cooler down in the very cold spring. I think It'd work.
*Lights.
Candles and kerosene lamps, lots of matches and lighters, and flashlights (with extra batteries) for if I need a quick night-light.
*No electricity.
Definite bummer, considering how attached to my computer I am. Who knows, maybe my life will improve by being unplugged? I know my time-management will. Besides, the only things I'll really NEED to have charged are my cell phone (in case of emergency) and my camera (a girl's gotta have priorities). I'm sure I'll manage to find somewhere with a plug for a few hours once a week. Maybe at work.
*Bugs.
Alright, this one I don't actually have an answer for. It'll probably be the worst part, and I have no defense other than bugspray, which I hate because it makes you feel slimy and smells funky.
*Bathroom.
Composting toilets. I hear they're the next big thing.
*Wild animals.
Luckily most of the ones who would eat me or Bailey (like the bobcat or fisher that are on the property) are nocturnal. As long as I have Bailey in before dark (it works with Rizzo, why shouldn't it work with Bailey?) we should be okay. That's the hope, anyway.
*Fear.
Not gonna lie, I'll probably get spooked there in the woods all by myself, especially the first few nights. It'd be better if I had a dog (don't ask why, but they're more bravery-boosting than my little kitten) but I don't, so I'll just have to get over it, right?

Alright, so what did I miss? I'd like the feedback, because I need to consider ALL the bad stuff more than the benefits, because I know it'd be hard to live there, and I have to realistically decide if it's something I could handle. No sense diving in without checking for aligators first, right?

Fairytale

Once upon a time, there was a princess.
Why? Because there's always a princess. Shut up; that's just how these things start. Ahem. Where was I? Oh yes, a princess.
Now this princess, she was not the normal sort. No fair-haired beauty, she, but a very ordinary looking sort, so long as purple-streaked hair and flannel shirts are ordinary.
What? 'Cause it's my story, that's why. She'll be a purple-haired punk redneck princess if I want her to be. Now stop interrupting.
So once upon a time this princess was riding through the kingdom on her fourwheeler, as all awesome royalty does, when she came across a woodchuck. Crap, that's not what I meant. She came across a person. Not a peasant; that wouldn't be very PC. Just an ordinary person. The person happened to be a guy. Not because a girl would be awkward or wrong in this situation, just that in this particular story, it was a guy. So this guy, we'll call him ummm... Stephen. Stephen very smartly got out of the way of the fourwheeler, because to stand in its way would be a silly thing to do. Getting run over by a fourwheeler, while probably not fatal, would still hurt a lot. Actually, it might be fatal. I'm not sure. I try to avoid that sort of thing. Anyway, the Princess, we'll call her Lisa-- no, I don't care if that's your sister's name. What? No! If it's good enough for your sister, it's good enough for this princess. Fine, whatever, we'll call her Lizzie then. Happy? Sheesh.
Anyway, before I was so rudely interrupted AGAIN, Lizzie pulled the fourwheeler over to the side of the road, and took off her helmet so that she could say hello. Of course she's wearing a helmet. It's safer, and besides, this story has to have a moral SOMEWHERE. Right. So she took off the helmet to say hello, because it's very hard to talk through a helmet. Besides, you just look silly.
After the obligatory introductions, Stephen, being a smarter-than-average bear-- No, he's not a bear, he's a boy. It's just a Yogi Bear reference. Augh, I hate telling stories to you young kids. You never understand anything.
So he's smart; let's just leave it at that. Okay, so being smart, Stephen figured that rescuing a princess would be worth some sort of reward. The hitch in this little plan was that the only princess available for rescue at the moment didn't seem to be in need of rescue. In fact, she was about as far from a damsel-in-distress as he was.
Thinking quickly, seeing as she was in jeans and a flannel shirt, riding a fourwheeler, he figured that she would enjoy some rougher trails-- more excitement, you see.
"Princess, if it interests you, there's a little side-trail that ends in the rockiest mud-pit you will find in the region." What? Because mud and rocks are what fourwheeling is all about! Man, what do you DO for fun? Don't you ever leave the house? I bet you just play videogames all day. Okay, so rocks and mudpits are fun for fourwheelers. That's all you need to know.
Good grief, we'll never get done at this rate.
Yadda yadda yadda, Lizzie zoomed off on the side trail in search of fun, and Stephen hurried after her, hoping her fourwheeler would get broken or stuck, and he'd get to rescue her and get some sort of a reward. Yes it's logical. Fourwheelers break all the time. If you haven't trashed yourself and your fourwheeler, you probably didn't have much fun.
So let's assume Stephen did something devious to make the fourwheeler break so he could rescue her. What? I don't know. If I knew, I'd have just said what he did. I've never sabotaged a fourwheeling trail before; I'm just assuming it can be done. Besides, I'm getting tired of this story. You interrupt too much. Besides, isn't it past your bedtime?
Okay, so we'll skip ahead again, the fourwheeler is broken, Lizzie is stuck in the mud, and Stephen shows up ready to somehow rescue her. He pulls her out of the mud and gives her a ride home, and then smiles, assuming he's about to get a big reward. Money, fame, maybe the key to the city, I don't know.
So anyways, Lizzie says "Thanks for helping me out," and then cuts off his head. The end.
Oh come on, that's a great ending, plus now at least the story is over and I can stop answering your stupid questions. Moral? I don't know. How about "don't trust a girl who can't rescue herself," or maybe "don't lose your head over some girl."
Wait no, I've got a good one:
Wear a helmet.

Open Letter

To everyone who knows me:

Please quit telling me "I told you so."

I want to be very clear about something: I am doing just fine. I may not be exactly where I want to be, but I am alright. I pay my bills on time, I have a steady paycheck, I'm a responsible pet owner (Bailey got spayed today), and though I may not know what I want right now, I'm at least getting done what I have to.
This whole Maryland experiment may not have gone the way I would have wished, but I'm proud of myself for doing it anyways. If I leave now, it isn't because I couldn't make it here on my own, or because I can't live without you. I can. I wasn't sure I could when I left, but now I've seen that I can, and that is why I am happy I tried it.

To everyone I don't know:

Please quit coming into my store and calling me "honey," "dear," "girlie," or "babe." I don't know you that well, and if you wouldn't treat my male coworkers that way, what makes you think it's okay to say it to me? Stop touching me. We're not friends; The smile I'm wearing is fake. I'm trying to get you to buy something from my store, because that's my job. I don't think you're charming or witty, and I don't like you invading my personal space.
On the other hand, I also don't like being ignored. After you say hi to ALL THREE of my male coworkers, it would be nice if you'd at least acknowledge my presence. If you don't, then at least don't expect me to fall over myself to help you later.

On that note, to Merry:
Thanks. You've been my saving grace down here. It's been a long time since I've had a close girl friend to just chill with, who wasn't trying to use me to hook up with my friends or just playing nice because we HAD to. I love that you brought me to watch your friend's band play, and that you go out of your way to drag me out for coffee at the bookstore when work or my apartment have become too much for me to handle. I really do appreciate it.

Update

Okay, so it's been a long time since I've posted. Mostly that's because there hasn't been much to say. Things haven't really improved, and if anything, they've gotten worse. I'm coping, but it's made me slightly more neurotic. Now, if my life is a mess, I end up cleaning my room. If my life is going to be a mess, it isn't fair that my room (or car) should be too.
Now, because Bailey's vet appointment to get spayed isn't till the 31st of this month, she's been locked in my room, and has taken her revenge. I've now got a horny and BORED destructo-kitty loose all day in my room, which is looking worse for wear no matter how often I clean it. Plus she keeps me up all night. I suppose this is what it's like to have a sixteen-year-old girl: my house is a mess, she's up all night, and there are two horny boys (Buddy and Po, my housemate's two un-neutered cats) yelling outside my door all the time, despite the numerous threats I've made to them at five a.m.
Student loans are another major stress factor, but I'm slowly getting control of that: I have the two smaller loans on automatic monthly payments, and the two bigger ones I do manually at the end of each month, so I can pay off a little more than just the minimum if I have a little extra in my paycheck. Since that's about all I can do, I have two options:
Option one: I can have a nervous breakdown about all the things I can't control or
Option two: I can do what I can about those, and then concentrate on what I CAN control.
I CAN control my grocery bill. Planning ahead when there are sales, and bringing my lunch to work rather than eating out every day definitely saves money.
I CAN control what I do in my free time. Two hours at the gym after work helps almost as much as a nap, plus it's better than earplugs for ignoring Bailey at night.
I CAN control my spending. Budgeting necessities like gas, food, rent and student loan payments, phone etc, I can see exactly where my money goes every month and not spend it on things I don't need and am just going to have to box up and move.
I CAN control my things. I can't control what how Bailey DESTROYS those things, but I can organize and pack away and give away anything I don't use/need.
I've been applying for new jobs and looking for new apartments everywhere from NY to ME, but nothing definitive yet. I've decided I need to be out by the end of April. The longer I stay here, the harder it will be to move, and the more strained my friendship with Cassie will be.
I'll miss Merry (who I've been hanging out with a lot) like crazy, I'll miss my gym (I have the option of a regular one within walking distance of my house WITH POOL/HOTTUB or an all-girls one a ten-minute drive away) and I'll miss my dentist, because finding a new one is such a pain, especially a nice/good one with a funny assistant.
I'll try to be better now about updating, but with so little going on (and so much of my time spent trying to keep Bailey from eating my bike) I make no promises.

Not a Southern Girl After All

So either I didn't go far enough South, or else I really am a Northerner.
Okay, so I hate the cold. I don't do any winter sports (the idea of even going outside is enough to make me want to go back to bed) and if I have to leave the house, I'm bundled up so much I walk around like that kid in my dad's favorite Christmas movie (A Christmas Story), you know, where I have so many layers on I can't put my arms down by myself and have to slowly waddle wherever I'm going.
I thought going south would be good, because winter would be just like a prolonged autumn without the pretty colors, but I was lied to. True, most of the time, I can get by with just a sweatshirt.
But when it DOES snow, oh my god, even three inches is deadly. I've become such a wuss since I don't have snowtires on my car and living in a state that sincerely believes that plows will work without actually touching the road. I'm not even exaggerating: after a harrowing drive home from work through about 5 inches of powder and slush, during which I witnessed a plow truck with the PLOW UP just throwing salt all over, a coworker tried to convince me that that was because "it's powder. You can't plow powder. It's not possible." The entire state is like that. Try driving in unplowable powder/slush with no snow tires and drivers who begin to panic hours before the first snowflake falls. I had a coworker call out of work because he'd seen a weather report that it would start snowing THAT NIGHT.
News update: Just got my second snowday (tomorrow)... from the same storm... which ended yesterday.

So I either didn't move South enough, or I'm really a Northern girl, because all day today, I missed New England like crazy. I spent all day looking for places to rent back in NE where I could have space and trees and not as many crazy people. If you haven't guessed, my housemates are driving me nuts.
I had thought to stay here at least through the summer, but I think this Maryland Experiment is about done. Keep an eye out for cheap places for me to rent, or animal-industry jobs!

Maryland is not really all that Merry

I'm a bit disappointed by that, actually.
I needed a change of scenery, and since Maine didn't work out (too cold for me) I moved in with one of my girl friends in Maryland. Her and her boyfriend, which I didn't know until I moved down here. Before I GOT here, I had been led to believe he was just a third housemate. Now he's my boss at work too. Yeah, not sure how long that's going to work out, but I'm trying.
Rizzo, the big blond love of my life, did not adjust well, and has spent nearly the entire month hiding under the china cabinet, so on my first visit home since moving in November, I'm bringing him back to my mother's.
Bailey, on the other hand, moved right in and promptly beat everyone into submission. For a while she kept trying to run outside, but after our one big snowstorm, i snapped a long leash to her collar with plenty of room for her to run, and let her "escape" out the door. She took off like a shot, hit the snow skidding, fell down the front steps, and decided she'd had enough. I had to drag her out from where she'd taken refuge under a parked car (that's what the leash was for) and she hasn't made an escape attempt since. Ahh the beauty of letting kids and critters make their own mistakes.
My friend Merry lives about 5 minutes down the road, which is kind of nice, even though I still don't get many chances to go visit with her.
Other than that, no real news, just looking forward to my visit home at the end of January!